Lesson: Learned.

The Universe seems to be throwing lessons at me left and right lately. The last of which happened last night. It was a friend's 30th birthday party we were headed to, on one of those nights that just wasn't panning out. We showed up to the restaurant and were told that the time had changed from 7:30 to 9:30, and they were totally booked for dinner. We were starving, so decided to go get dinner, find out from someone the new plan, and show back up there at 9:30. Turns out, 7:30 was the time, but no one would be eating til 9:30. They'd be drinking in the bar, with no appetizers.

Anyway, Chris begged me to go into a drug store to get him some - GasX! I suggested he go to the Walgreen's over a local, more pricy pharmacy. Coincidence? I think not. So, with my selfish motive of needing some hand cream, I obliged him. And had it been me and tampons, I wonder what would have happened? As I walked out of the store in the more seedy part of town, I got a little eery feeling, like someone was going to pull up and rob the place or something. Before I knew it, we had turned onto a street, chatting away, deciding where to eat, and BAM! My head flung forward and Chris slammed on the brakes. We'd been rear-ended. Chris jumped out to find the driver who hit us open his door and fall to the pavement. "Call 911! He's convulsing or something."

So, in my panic mode, I called and all frazzled gave them our location. Those 911 people drive me effing crazy. Like they expect a person who's in a panic, been shot, being robbed, whatever, to be totally calm and collected and chill when they call. They never seem to be in a hurry themselves. They're just sitting there eating their snacks and drinking their Mountain Dew, and I don't know, that 's just how they come off to me. Like the time my toaster oven caught on fire and after a string of questions, I had the fire put out before they even began to send a truck out.

Anyhoo, random people started to stop, and finally a couple firetrucks, a few cop cars and an ambulance - finally. All I could think was one thing: Thank the sweet baby hay-seuss that we were totally and completely sober. No pre-dinner drinks, no cup of wine in the car, no beer bottle between Chris' legs. Sober. Innocent. All dressed up like respectable citizens. Not guilty.

The convulsing guy, it seems, had been chasing three women in a car all over town, trying to run them off the road, they alleged. He had "anger issues," they said. So, after being detained a bit, we were told to call tomorrow to get more info, like whether he was insured or not. The kid was under 20, and I suspect he was faking convulsions to get himself out of trouble. According to the cops, he was going to jail regardless. After they carted him off on the stretcher.

We weren't hurt, even though Chris didn't have his seatbelt on. But, like they say, it's always the unexpected. He doesn't wear his seatbelt just driving around town, but you never know when someone is going to ram you, maybe because they're having a stroke or they black out or who knows! Ya never do. Our bumper had only a dent, and Chris' head didn't hit the windshield. I could personally care less about the dent, but he does. All I care about is that we didn't go to jail due to red wine spilled all over my blouse or Chris smelling like a brewery. C'mon, admit it, know you've done it too. But we were totally innocent, and took away with it: take a freaking cab. If we're gonna have more than 2 drinks, take a cab or stay our asses at home and booze it up there.

I do also care about that guy, if he was really convulsing, but it does appears that he may have been a little bit dangerous. So, lucky again. When we call tomorrow I guess we can ask for a copy of the police report, but I say we leave him alone. Don't want some angry teenager with a vengeance after us, right?

So, that was our eventful evening, The End.

~R